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How to Ask for a Favor and Not Leave a Terrible Impression

May 11, 2018 by Vicki Tillman 1 Comment

Take my word for it, this is important: How to ask for a favor and not leave a terrible impression.

How to Ask for a Favor and Not Leave a Terrible Impression

How to Ask for a Favor and Not Leave a Terrible Impression

Have you ever been asked to do someone a favor, you do it and then feel like you’ve totally been taken advantage of, disrespected or devalued? It certainly doesn’t make you want to do that person a favor next time they ask.

If you know someone who is inclined to do an asinine job of receiving favors that they ask for, tell them this:

Do me a favor, next time you need to ask someone a favor, read this post first.

Here’s how to ask for a favor and not leave a terrible impression:

*Ask. 

Don’t say, “I need you to do something for me…”

Try this instead:

  • “Could I ask you a favor? Would you do…,please?”
  • “Would you mind doing something for me? Would you…, please?”
  • “Could I impose on you to…, please?”

Notice: Each of the asks ends with the word, “Please”. Please is not optional when asking for favors if you don’t want to leave a terrible impression.

*Make it easy on the person to do the favor for you.

If they need information, don’t make them do a google search or dig through 10 years of past records. If you have access to what the person who is doing you a favor needs, give it to them. Examples of this:

  • If you need a referral or recommendation: Write examples of the work you and the referrer have done together in order to jog their memories. Give them a list of accomplishments.
  • If you need a review: Give the person the materials you want reviewed.
  • If you need them to stop by the store on the way home: Text them a list. A verbal list is too hard to remember.
  • If you need tutoring: Bring your textbook and course materials.

Making it easy to do the favor is not an option if you don’t want to leave a terrible impression.

*Say ‘Thank you’ when the favor is done.

In my experience, it not common to receive thanks when a favor is complete. The favor-asker often moves right on with life. It is also my experience that when I am not thanked for doing a favor:

  • I feel taken advantage of
  • I am less inclined to do another favor if that person wants something else done
  • The favor asker has left a bad impression

*Return the favor.

Remember: the person who did you a favor gave something up to do you that favor. They gave time or money or resources. The favor cost them something. So, it is thoughtful to return the favor.

Returning a favor is simply doing something nice for the person who did you the favor. It’s kind of like a human version of karma: favors are given, favors come back around. This creates goodwill and an atmosphere of giving.

There are lots of ways to return a favor. Here are a few ideas:

  • Write a thank you note. (This is above and beyond the verbal ‘thank you’.) Snail-mail it. Don’t email it.
  • Give some social media love.
  • Send some flowers.
  • Ask, “What can I do for you?”
  • Occasionally, the situation will not ethically allow the favor-giver to receive a repay. In this case, simply talk well about the favor-giver when you have the opportunity.

People who do not return the favors appear ungrateful and leave a bad impression.

A little bit of thoughtfulness from a favor-asker is all that’s needed to prevent creating bad impressions!

If you need a little coaching to build your confidence on favor-asking, contact me or schedule an appointment now. Coaching will help you become the kind of person who people LOVE to do favors for.

How to Ask for a Favor and Not Leave a Terrible Impression

Filed Under: Skills for Success, Uncategorized Tagged With: Healthy lifestyle, how to ask for favors, Relationship Skills

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  • Vicki Tillman is a gifted career counselor with a passion for helping adolescents and adults find their futures. She believes God has blessed each of us with unique gifts, abilities and callings. I have seen Vicki work with students, individuals as well as groups. She helps people identify their strengths and passions and view them as possibilities.

    Vicki Tillman has helped all 4 of my children discern more about what God has in store for them. Their experiences have ranged from knowing very clearly where they intend to go and how they intend to get there to having absolutely no direction regarding career or future education.

    Her personal style is charming, engaging and a wonderful balance of serious without being too serious. Watching Vicki work with my teens and countless other teens and parents has given me the confidence to enthusiastically recommend her to anyone wishing to walk into their future with faith.

    - KS

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